Monday, March 25, 2019

Decision

K and I have struggled all weekend with this decision.  As painful as it is we will be taking our Buster to the vet today to help usher him over the Rainbow Bridge between 2 and 2:30.  It is probably past time.  He hasn't been our Buster for almost a year.  During that time we have had to help him get up to stand or walk almost every time.  He had just become too weak in his rear legs mostly.  He has lost interest in all of his toys.  He has developed anxiety that is evident when we are out of his sight and also at night.  At night he just can't seem to settle down despite our best efforts to help him.  He has some good days and our hopes are buoyed, but his good days aren't real good and the bad days outnumber them.






We don't take this lightly.  I have spent time looking at various articles about knowing when it is time.  The anxiety is a large concern from what I read.  It seems they can tell they are now very vulnerable and night brings on fears of being prey.  He has had this for the last couple months.  Part of that is because he can't hear us much anymore and also his eyesight seems to be failing some.  It has been difficult to find anything that could help him.  He finally gives in to exhaustion.  

He is almost 15 years old now.  It's been a good run.  We believe we have given him our best as he has done for us.  He deserved our best.  It has been 12 years since the last time we did this with his sister.  That was traumatic having to do that then as it was a surprise situation and all the emotional upheaval was almost unbearable.  We don't want to wait for an emergency situation this time.  Send him over so he doesn't have to bear the pain of what is coming.  As hard as this is, we only do this out of our love for Buster and not wanting him to suffer.  And we have a chance to say goodbye.

It's time.

3 comments:

Old NFO said...

So sorry to hear that, but know that Buster will be waiting on you, and will no longer be in pain.

Fred Gilbert said...

Randy: you are absolutely doing the right thing in sparing your buddy continuing pain and discomfort. He has lived a long life and now it is time to go. I am almost 76 years old and have had to go through this more than once with beloved dogs and cats in my lifetime. I will share with you some words that have given me comfort in the past when faced with this heart wrenching duty.

TAKE JOY IN OLD DOGS by Donna Swajeski
Their joys are simple. A soft bed. A scrap fallen from the table that the younger dogs missed. The memory of a treed squirrel. A stormless night.
White whiskered faces and legs crooked as question marks.
Old Dogs…their sweet Buddha bellies hang over crossed legs as they fall asleep in a coveted patch of sun. Dreaming of out-racing their shadows down long, shady lanes.
Once they danced by your side. The very definition of joy unleashed. A perfect poem caught in shining eyes and wagging tails. They have followed you faithfully for years. And would plunge into fires, untamed wildernesses, raging waters if you asked.
Now, they struggle to catch up. Their pace slow but their hearts still valiant.
Their cloudy eyes are starting to dim and go distant, tuning in to some invisible world. Just beyond your reach.
Don’t go you say, as you scratch the tender part between their ears. Stay longer. I can’t imagine a world without your fur pressed close to my cheek. There are still so many roads we haven’t explored.
And they look up at you with a wisdom that just slays you.
Their backs are bent, not from the weight of years, but from the invisible wings they are growing
That will soon take them to a place where once more they are warriors of speed
Drunk with the sights and scents of a thousand meadows.
Able to leap high enough to touch the wing of the tiniest butterfly.
A place where they will now wait for you to catch up. God Bless!

Fred G

Randy said...

Thank you both